最新圣誕節(jié)英語笑話
Christmas Eve Service 平安夜禮拜
Just as I began my Christmas Eve service, the electricity in the church failed. The ushers and I found some candles and placed them around the sanctuary. Then I reentered the pulpit, shuffled my notes, and muttered, "Now, where was I?" A tired voice called out, "Right near the end!"
就在我開始平安夜禱告時，教堂停電了。教堂里的接待人員和我找到一些蠟燭，把它們放在禮堂周圍。然后我重返講道壇，整理了一下筆記后，我說：“剛才我講到哪兒了?”傳來一陣不耐煩的聲音：“馬上就講完了!”
A Christmas Gift 圣誕禮物
A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas.
圣誕節(jié)來了，一位先生給他太太送的圣誕禮物是一個非常漂亮的鉆石戒子。
After hearing about this extravagant gift, a friend of his said, "I thought she wanted one of those sporty four-wheel-drive vehicles."
他朋友聽到他買這么奢侈的`禮物后，說到：“她不是想要輛四驅(qū)車嗎”。
"She did," he replied. "But where was I going to find a fake Jeep?"
先生答：“是啊，(可以買到假鉆石)，可去哪里能買一輛假吉普車呢?”
At Grandma's 在奶奶家過圣誕節(jié)
Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents. At bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers when the youngest one began praying at the top of his lungs.
兩個小男孩在奶奶家過平安夜，臨睡前，兩個小家伙跪在床邊禱告，弟弟便扯開嗓子大喊出自己的愿望。
"I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE...
我希望收到一輛自行車...
I PRAY FOR A NEW NINTENDO...
還有一部任天堂游戲機....
I PRAY FOR A NEW VCR..."
還有新的錄像機
His older brother leaned over and nudged the younger brother and said, "Why are you shouting your prayers? God isn't deaf." To which the little brother replied, "No, but Gramma is!"
小男孩的哥哥搓了搓他說道：“你干嘛禱告得這么大聲，上帝又不是聾子”。弟弟回答到：“我知道上帝不是聾子，可是奶奶是啊”。
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