關(guān)于英文笑話

　　關(guān)于英文笑話一：

　　A young man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at McDonald's. He noticed that they had ordered one meal, and an extra drink cup. As he watched, the gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then counted out the fries, one for him, one for her, until each had half of them. Then he poured half of the soft drink into the extra cup and set that in front of his wife. The old man then began to eat, and his wife sat watching, with her hands folded in her lap.

　　一個(gè)年輕人在麥當(dāng)勞里看見(jiàn)一對(duì)年邁的夫婦在吃午餐。他發(fā)現(xiàn)那對(duì)夫婦只點(diǎn)了單人餐，還要了一個(gè)空杯子。年輕人看見(jiàn)丈夫認(rèn)真地把漢堡分成兩半，把薯?xiàng)l一根一根數(shù)出來(lái)同樣放成兩堆，一份給自己，一份放在妻子面前。之后丈夫把飲料一半倒到空杯子里，同樣放到妻子面前。這時(shí)丈夫開(kāi)始吃了，而妻子卻把手?jǐn)傇谙ドw上，在一旁看著。

　　The young man decided to ask if they would allow him to purchase another meal for them so that they didn't have to split theirs.

　　年輕人決定上前請(qǐng)那對(duì)夫婦允許他為他們?cè)儋I(mǎi)一份單人餐，這樣他們就不用分一份了。

　　The old gentleman said, "Oh no. We've been married 50 years, and everything has always been and will always be shared, 50/50."

　　丈夫說(shuō)道：“哦，不用了。我們已經(jīng)結(jié)婚50年了，所有的東西我們都會(huì)一起分享，對(duì)半兒分。”

　　The young man then asked the wife if she was going to eat, and she replied, "It's his turn with the teeth."

　　然后年輕人問(wèn)妻子她為什么不吃，她說(shuō)：“這回他先用假牙。”

　　關(guān)于英文笑話二：

　　Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were taking a walk one fine March day.

　　有三個(gè)退休的老人，都患有重聽(tīng)。三月里風(fēng)和日麗的一天，他們?cè)谝黄鹕⒉健?/p>

　　One remarked to the other, "Windy, ain't it?"

　　其中一個(gè)人對(duì)另一個(gè)人說(shuō)：“這天兒風(fēng)有點(diǎn)兒大，是吧?”

　　"No," the second man replied, "It's Thursday."

　　“不是，”第二個(gè)人回答道，“今天是星期四。”

　　And the third man chimed in, "So am I. Let's have a coke."

　　第三個(gè)人插話進(jìn)來(lái)說(shuō)：“我也是，去買(mǎi)瓶可樂(lè)吧。”

　　關(guān)于英文笑話三：

　　An elderly woman from Brooklyn decided to prepare her will and make her final requests. She told her rabbi she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered over Bloomingdales.

　　布魯克林的一位年邁的婦女決定準(zhǔn)備自己的遺囑，提出最后的要求。她告訴自己的猶太教士說(shuō)她有兩個(gè)臨終前的要求。第一，她要火化;第二，她要把骨灰撒到布魯明黛。

　　"Bloomingdales!" the rabbi exclaimed. "Why Bloomingdales?"

　　“布魯明黛!”教士叫道，“為什么在布魯明黛?”

　　"Then I'll be sure my daughters visit me twice a week."

　　“那樣的話我女兒肯定一周會(huì)探望我兩次。”

　　Note: 布魯明黛(Bloomingdale's)是一家連鎖百貨公司，與梅西百貨同屬聯(lián)邦百貨公司旗下。布魯明黛在美國(guó)有超過(guò)36家分店。

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