兒童英語(yǔ)笑話3則
A Man of Actions
A crowd of student was gathered on the campus of Oxford University. “You can have no doubt,” shouted a young man excitedly, “that if the Dean does not take back what he said to me this morning, I’ll leave Oxford this very evening!”
A buzzing noise followed. “What a man of actions!” one said in admiration. “How should we support him and learn from him!” said another.
Suddenly, a girl asked, “What did the Dean say to you, Hob?”
He bent and whispered to her, “Well,er???er???Miss Rose, er???he told me to get clean away from Oxford this very evening!”
一群學(xué)生聚在牛津的校園里，一個(gè)年輕人情緒激動(dòng)地叫道：“毋庸置疑，如果那個(gè)家伙不收回他今早 對(duì)我說(shuō)的話，我今晚就離開(kāi)牛津。”
下面一片喧嘩。“真是個(gè)言出必行的人。”一個(gè)人艷羨地說(shuō)。另一個(gè)說(shuō)：“我們要支持他、學(xué)習(xí)他。”
突然，一個(gè)女孩問(wèn)道：“那家伙對(duì)你說(shuō)什么了，霍波?”
他彎下腰小聲說(shuō)：“哦，呃…呃…，羅斯小姐，呃…他說(shuō)要我今晚從牛津滾出去。”
Whats time to a pig?
One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farms looked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living. The city man saw a farmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree. The city man said to the farmer," I see that your pig likes apples, but isn"t that quite a waste of time?" The farmer replied," What"s time to a pig?"
一天，有一個(gè)城市里的游客來(lái)到一個(gè)小鄉(xiāng)村，在鄉(xiāng)間路上開(kāi)著車(chē)，想看看農(nóng)莊是什么樣子，也想看看農(nóng)夫怎樣種田過(guò)日子。這位城里人看見(jiàn)一位農(nóng)夫在宅后的草地 上，手中抱著一頭豬，并把它舉得高高的，好讓它能夠吃到樹(shù)上的蘋(píng)果。城里人對(duì)農(nóng)夫說(shuō)，"我看你的豬挺喜歡吃蘋(píng)果的.，但是，這不是很浪費(fèi)時(shí)間嗎?"那位農(nóng)夫 回答說(shuō)，“時(shí)間對(duì)豬有什么意義?”
再見(jiàn)
Two tomatoes go shopping, a tomato suddenly walk fast, the second tomato asks: "where shall we go?" The first tomato has no answer, the second tomato asked again. The tomato has no answer, so the second tomato asked again. The first tomato finally turned slowly, said: "we are not tomatoes? We can talk?"
兩顆番茄去逛街，第一顆番茄突然走得很快，第二顆番茄就問(wèn)：“我們要去哪里?” 第一顆番茄沒(méi)有回答，第二顆番茄又問(wèn)了一次。 第一顆番茄還沒(méi)回答，所以第二顆番茄又問(wèn)了一次。 第一顆番茄終于慢慢轉(zhuǎn)頭說(shuō)：“我們不是番茄嗎?我們會(huì)說(shuō)話嗎?”
On a trip to Disney World in Florida, my husband and I and our two children devoted ourselves wholeheartedly to the wonders of this attraction. After three exhausting days, we headed for home.
As we drove away, our son waved and said, "Goodbye, Mickey."
Our daughter waved and said, "Goodbye, Minnie."
My husband waved, rather weakly, and said, "Goodbye, Money."
迪斯尼之旅 弗羅里達(dá)州的迪斯尼樂(lè)園是一個(gè)迷人的地方。一次我和丈夫以及兩個(gè)孩子前往旅游，我們?nèi)硇牡爻磷碓谒母鞣N奇觀之中。精疲力竭地玩了三天之后，我們要回家了。
當(dāng)我們驅(qū)車(chē)離開(kāi)時(shí)，兒子揮手說(shuō)：“再見(jiàn)，美奇。”
女兒揮著手說(shuō)，“再見(jiàn)，美妮。”
丈夫也有氣無(wú)力地?fù)]了揮手，說(shuō)道：“再見(jiàn)，美元。”
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