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英語(yǔ)笑話大全笑破你肚子簡(jiǎn)短
你看得懂沒(méi)有翻譯的英語(yǔ)笑話嗎?下面yjbys小編為您分享的是帶翻譯的哦。
Apprehending Criminals
逮捕罪犯
The Los Angeles Police Department,the FBI,and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are thebest at apprehending criminals.
洛杉磯警察局、聯(lián)邦調(diào)查局和中央情報(bào)局，都想要證明他們最會(huì)逮捕罪犯。
The President decides to give them a test.
于是總統(tǒng)決定要考考他們。
He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.
他把一只兔子放進(jìn)森林，而他們每一個(gè)人都必須去抓它。
The CIA goes in.
中央情報(bào)局的人進(jìn)去了。
They place animal informants throughout the forest.
他們?cè)谡麄�(gè)森林里放置了動(dòng)物通報(bào)器。
They question all plant and mineral witnesses.
他們質(zhì)問(wèn)所有的 植物和礦物證人。
After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist.
就在三個(gè)月的密集調(diào)查之后，他們得到的結(jié)論就是兔子不存在。
The FBI goes in.After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest ,
聯(lián)邦調(diào)查局韻人進(jìn)去了。就在兩個(gè)星期都沒(méi)有線索之后，
killing everything in it,including the rabbit,and they make no apologies.
他們放火把森林燒了，殺光了里面的一切，包括這只，兔子在內(nèi) ，而且他們并沒(méi)有表現(xiàn)出歉意。
The LAPD goes in.They come out two hours later with a baddly beaten bear.
洛杉礬警察局的人進(jìn)去了。兩個(gè)小時(shí)之后，他們帶著一只慘遭嚴(yán)重毆打的熊出來(lái)。
The bear is yelling;"Ok!I am a rabbit!I'm a rabbit!"
這只熊大聲地喊著說(shuō)：“好啦!好啦!我是兔子啦!我是兔子啦!”
關(guān)于元旦的英語(yǔ)笑話
hospitality
the hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. the little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. the visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "you must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. where did you find the cheese?" "in the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.
好客
由于客人在吃蘋(píng)果餡餅時(shí)，家里沒(méi)有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。這家的小男孩悄悄地離開(kāi)了屋子。過(guò)了一會(huì)兒，他拿著一片奶酪回到房間，把奶酪放在客人的盤(pán)子里。 客人微笑著把奶酪放進(jìn)嘴里說(shuō)：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你媽媽的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夾上，先生。”那小男孩說(shuō)。
關(guān)于春節(jié)的英語(yǔ)笑話精選如下：
01.:how long will the next bus be?
b:it's about 45 feet.
這是玩得文字游戲。用中文就沒(méi)勁了。翻成中文就不好笑了。
02.a: i have seen your face somewhere?
b: yes, it has always been just right here between my two ears.
怎么樣啊? 能悟出它的幽默所在嗎?
03.customer: these shoes are much too narrow and pointed.
shoes cleark: that's what they' re wearing this season.
customer: perhaps so,but i'm still wearing last season'feet.
04.doctor: your cough sounds much better today.
patient: it should. i've been practicing all night.
你的咳嗽今天聽(tīng)上去好點(diǎn)了
病人： 應(yīng)該是好點(diǎn)了。昨晚我練了一個(gè)晚上。
05.the company's mission to eat nian fan
this year in the company for the new year together, eating regiment nian fan, the manager drunk, going to the toilet and vomiting, to coincide with a male staff member is urinate, the manager angrily, saying: that of how a good drink still pouring? male wensheng emergency stop, but he unexpectedly biechu ass, the manager was furious: damn! who opened the bottle?
翻譯：
在公司吃團(tuán)年飯
今年在公司里過(guò)春節(jié),在一起吃團(tuán)年飯時(shí)，經(jīng)理酒醉，入廁嘔吐，恰逢一男職員正小解，經(jīng)理怒曰：說(shuō)好不喝了怎么還倒酒?男聞聲急停，不料憋出個(gè)屁來(lái)，經(jīng)理大怒：媽的!誰(shuí)又開(kāi)了一瓶?
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