簡(jiǎn)單搞笑英語(yǔ)笑話
生活中多點(diǎn)歡笑總是好的，今天我們就一起來(lái)欣賞欣賞簡(jiǎn)單搞笑英語(yǔ)笑話吧!
簡(jiǎn)單搞笑英語(yǔ)笑話(一)
你丈夫需要安靜地休息
Doctor:Your husband needs rest and peace.Here are some sleeping pills.
醫(yī)生：你丈夫需要安靜地休息。這是安眠藥。
Wife:When must I give them to him?
老婆：我什么時(shí)候給他吃?
Doctor:They are for you.
醫(yī)生：這是給你的。
簡(jiǎn)單搞笑英語(yǔ)笑話(二)
三只烏龜
Three turtles decided to have a cup of coffee.
三只烏龜決定去喝咖啡。
Just as they got into the cafe, it started to rain.
它們剛到咖啡店的'門(mén)口，就下起雨來(lái)。
The biggest turtle said to the smallest one, " Go home and get the umbrella."
于是最大的那只烏龜對(duì)最小的烏龜說(shuō)，“你回家去取傘吧。”
The little turtle replied, "I will, if you don't drink my offee."
最小的烏龜說(shuō)，“如果你們不把我的咖啡喝了，我就去。”
"We won't," the other two promised.
“我們不喝，”另外兩只烏龜答應(yīng)說(shuō)。
Two years later the big turtle said to the middle turtle, "Well, I guess he isn't coming back, so we might as well drink his coffee."
兩年后，大烏龜對(duì)中烏龜說(shuō)，“好吧，我猜他肯定不回來(lái)了，我們可以把它的咖啡喝掉了。”
Just then a voice called from outside the door, "If you do, I won't go."
正在這時(shí)，一個(gè)聲音從門(mén)外傳來(lái)，“你們要是喝了，我就不去。”
簡(jiǎn)單搞笑英語(yǔ)笑話(三)
兒子的零花錢(qián)
After sending our son away to college, he would often call up asking for money.
自從送了我兒子去上大學(xué)之后，他就經(jīng)常打電話問(wèn)我們要錢(qián)。
One time when he called my husband answered, "sure we will send you money"he said," and I also noticed that you left your Physics book here, should we send that also?"
有一回他打電話過(guò)來(lái)，是我的老公接的，我老公回道：“我們會(huì)給你匯錢(qián)過(guò)去的，另外我看見(jiàn)你把你的物理書(shū)掉在家里了，我們要把那書(shū)也寄過(guò)去么?”
"Uh, oh yeah, OK," he responded. I asked him afterward how much he sent up "$1,100" he said. When I gave him a surprised look, he explained, "Don't worry, I taped a $100 check on the cover, and the other $1000 check inside the cover!
“呃，好的”兒子回答道。后來(lái)我問(wèn)我老公他給兒子寄了多少錢(qián)。“1100美元”他說(shuō)。當(dāng)看見(jiàn)我驚訝的表情后他解釋道：“不用擔(dān)心，我把100美元的支票粘在了書(shū)的封面，另外1000美元的支票粘在了封面里面!”
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