英語笑話經(jīng)典段子
笑話是一種簡短的藝術(shù)語言,它能調(diào)劑我們的心情,今天我們就一起來看看英語笑話經(jīng)典段子吧!
英語笑話經(jīng)典段子(一)
一個小男孩非常想要一百美元買一輛自行車,但是祈禱了兩個星期也沒有結(jié)果。于是,他決定給上帝寫一封信要這一百美元。當(dāng)郵局收到這封收信人為“美國,上帝”的信后,他們決定把它寄給美國總統(tǒng)?偨y(tǒng)很重視,也很感動。他命令他的秘書寄給個小男孩五美元紙鈔?偨y(tǒng)認為這對于一個小男孩來說應(yīng)該是一筆大錢了。這個小男孩收到這五美元后非常高興,又坐下來給上帝寫了一封感謝信,信中寫道:
A little boy wanted one hundred dollar for a bicycle very badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write a letter to the Lord requesting the money. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to the Lord, USA,they decided to send it to the president. The President was so impressed,touched and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a five bill. The President thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. The little boy was delighted wish the five-dollar bill and sat down to write a thank-you note to the Lord, which read:
親愛的上帝:
Dear Lord,
非常感謝你寄給我的錢。可是我發(fā)現(xiàn),由于某種原因您通過華盛頓寄給我的錢,像往常一樣,那些奇怪的人扣走了九十五美元。
Thank you very much for sending me the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through Washington, DC and as usual, those jerks deducted ninety-five dollars.
羅杰
Love,Roger
英語笑話經(jīng)典段子(二)
A film crew was on location deep in the desert. One day an old Indian went up to the director and said, "It will rain tomorrow." The next day it rained.
一個電影攝制組在沙漠深處進行拍攝。一天,一個印度老人來到導(dǎo)演面前對他說:“明天會下雨。”第二天果然下雨了。
A week later, the Indian went up to the director again and said, "There will be a storm tomorrow." The next day there was a storm.
一周以后,印度人又來了,他告訴導(dǎo)演說:“明天會有暴風(fēng)雨。”果然,第二天有暴風(fēng)雨。
"This Indian is incredible," said the director. He told his secretary to hire the Indian to predict the weather.
“這個印度人真神,”導(dǎo)演說。他告訴他的秘書去雇傭這個印度人來預(yù)測天氣。
However, after several successful predictions, the old Indian didn't show up for two weeks.
然而,幾次預(yù)測天氣成功之后,這個印度人連續(xù)兩周沒有露面。
Finally the director sent for him. "I have to shoot an important scene tomorrow," said the director. "And I'm depending on you. What will the weather be like?"
最后,導(dǎo)演派人把這個印度人請來了。導(dǎo)演對他說:“我明天必須拍攝一個很重要的`場景,全都指望你了,明天天氣如何啊?”
The Indian shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know," he said. "My radio is broken."
這個印度人聳了聳肩說道:“我不知道,我的收音機壞了。”
英語笑話經(jīng)典段子(三)
One open hummer turn a corner to meet acquaintances, chat.
When a guy says: "the elder brothers, to drive forward, narrow road, a corner to my car."
Open hummer says scornfully: "what car you drive not to, wait a minute."
Men spoke a few times, hummer owner did not move.
Guy a little bit angry said: "don't move is! A moment touch bad don't call ah!"
Then go, hummer owner and his friend also said: "what car and don't touch me."
Just then, his friend looked up, said: "you still let! He came over."
Hummer owners turned a look, oh! Get on the bus go right away.
Just behind the man in the call: "you are not afraid of touch? Don't go!"
Hummer owner: "you didn't say you open the digger!"
一人開悍馬到拐彎出碰到熟人,下車聊天。
這時過來一男的說:“哥們,車朝前開開,拐彎路窄,我車過不來。”
開悍馬車不屑的說:“你開什么車過不來,等一會。”
男的說了幾次,悍馬車主就是不動。
男的有點生氣說:“不動是吧!一會碰壞了別叫呀!”
然后走了,悍馬車主還和他朋友說:“什么車能和我別碰。”
正說著,他朋友抬頭一看說:“你還是讓讓吧!他開過來了。”
悍馬車主轉(zhuǎn)身一看,哎呀!馬上上車就走。
剛才那男的在后面叫:“你不是不怕碰嗎?別走呀!”
悍馬車主:“你也沒說你開的挖掘機呀!”
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