英語(yǔ)搞笑話劇劇本(精選5篇)
在參加英語(yǔ)文化活動(dòng)時(shí),我們可以準(zhǔn)備一個(gè)英語(yǔ)話劇,表演給大家看。以下是小編精心準(zhǔn)備的英語(yǔ)搞笑話劇劇本,大家可以參考以下內(nèi)容哦!
英語(yǔ)搞笑話劇劇本 篇1
甲:Hello,every one, have you ever seen the movie? Yeah, you are right, I'm the director-- Cameron Diaz, applaud , thank you....Recently, I will direct a new movie called < Avatar 2 >, today, there will be a audition and I will select three actresses who can get the chance to perform in this film with famous actress---Anne Hathaway,OK, let's begin. At first , talent show, number one, let's welcome.
乙:(風(fēng)情萬(wàn)種,妖嬈嫵媚地走進(jìn)來(lái),給觀眾一個(gè)飛吻):oh,honey,dear,sweet,darling director, the most beautiful charming, sexy girl is coming , every body knows me, right? Yeah, I'm Nicole Kidman, open your eyes as big as you can and hold your breath, there will be a unique, fantastic dance show for you, I believe that all of you will be crazy about it ,(打個(gè)響指) come some music.(搞笑舞,自由發(fā)揮). (跳完,鞠躬,向觀眾謝幕), thank you,(面向?qū)а?, honey, is it a wonderful performance?
甲:(作目瞪口呆狀),
乙:(在甲眼前晃手),oh, darling, are you Ok?
甲:eh...my god, have you use some stimulant drugs this morning, you make my nerves nervous. Get out , next one.
乙:oh no ...sweet ,you break my heart...(掩面離去)
丙:oh it seems to be serious. God bless me(畫個(gè)十字架,鎮(zhèn)定地走到甲面前,伸出手), nice to meet you, director.
甲:(與之握手),nice to meet you too,so, introduce yourself please.
丙:I'm Celine Dion, you know, I don't have too many achievements, I just won five Grammy awards, 12 World Music Awards, 7 American Music Awards , 21 Juno Awards and(做沉思狀) oh, I forget it , a Oscar Award, (同學(xué)鼓掌,乙作安撫狀),oh, calm down, calm down,it's just a piece of cake for me ,you know, I....
甲:ok ,stop, time is limited, just begin
丙:OK!!! I'll use my first signature song to conquer you --my heart will go on, just enjoy it.
near, far, wherever you are
i believe that the heart does go on
once more, you opened the door(甲stop stop,丙不理,繼續(xù)作深情狀)
and you're here in my heart,
and my heart will go on and on.
甲:guard ,guard,help,drag this mad woman out.
Oh, I'm dying,hope the next one will give me a surprise
丁:(對(duì)著乙的背影,沉思狀)to be,or not to be,it's a question!(走到甲面前牽起她的手做親吻狀),I'm glad to see you,my dear princess.
甲(做嬌羞狀):oh, it's really a big surprise,so what's your name?
丁:My name? Oh, wait a minute. Do you know Trish Regan?(甲,白癡的搖頭),eh..,it's ok,then how about Robin Meade?(搖頭),and Melissa Theuriau?(搖頭),(丁,情緒激動(dòng)),you know nothing, how can you sit in here.
甲(指門,氣憤狀),you you you.....
丁:ok ok, it doesn't matter, you needn't learn about them, but you must know me, the most famous hostess who will catch up with those person and become the greatest poet---oprah!
甲:I don't care who you are, just show me your talent.
丁:ok ,listen,one poem,I have had found my best love, but I didn’t treasure her. When I lost her, I regret. It’s the most pain in the world. If God can give me another chance, I will say there words to her “I love you”!
甲(起雞皮疙瘩狀):oh, I can't stand, show you the door,
丁(轉(zhuǎn)身離開(kāi),繼續(xù)臺(tái)詞):If there is a time limit, I hope, it is (回頭,對(duì)甲)10 thousand years.
甲:oh, it's really a terrible ,awful, horrible day,why it is such difficult to find an excellent actress.Oh, I'm dying,you three, come here,
三人跑進(jìn)來(lái),乙嫵媚狀:honey, you like my dance,right?
丙鎮(zhèn)靜狀:director,you like my singing,right?
丁深情狀:princess,you like my poet,right?
三人同聲:we are past,right?
甲:eh..Thank you for your eh..Wonderful performance,but,I'm sorry to tell you ....(接電話) What? Nobody comes here except they three,oh...god.(掛電話,低頭),you three,(抬頭),pass!
三人歡呼,說(shuō):we make it,we are superstar!
乙(甜蜜狀):that's very sweet of you,we love you so much(飛個(gè)吻)
甲:you know, you are not good enough now, but I'm look forward to your progress.Do you have confidence?
三人齊答:yes,we do!
甲伸手,三人搭上,同聲,fight,fight,fight!
英語(yǔ)搞笑話劇劇本 篇2
人物:追星A, 追星B,追星C,明星,車主 旁白 經(jīng)紀(jì)人
旁白:A girl is crazy about a star called Handsome+人名. Even when she is asleep, she can dream that man.
A:(打哈欠),I need to go to bed, I’m so sleepy.(打哈欠)——邊走邊說(shuō) (趴在講臺(tái)上睡)
。ㄟM(jìn)入夢(mèng)鄉(xiāng))
旁白:In her dream……
(上臺(tái)擺兩個(gè)凳子,A做一個(gè))
A:Oh, it’s a fine day. (假裝看天) (然后突然不經(jīng)意的拿起一本書翻看)
明星:(上臺(tái)):Oh, it’s a fine day. (然后坐凳子)
(A看著看著書,就不經(jīng)意的往旁邊看,然后再看看書,突然感覺(jué)不對(duì)勁,在意外的往旁邊看,看到了自己最喜愛(ài)的.那個(gè)明星,十分激動(dòng),不敢相信這是真的)
A:Are you … are you that … super star?(激動(dòng)地說(shuō)不出話)
明星:(隨意的回答) Yes, what’s wrong?
A: I’m your fan,super fan. Your photos are full of my bedroom, no, they are full of my house, including kitchen, living room, bedrooms, and… and toilet.
(激動(dòng),后面講到廁所時(shí),還有點(diǎn)不好意思)
(當(dāng)明星聽(tīng)到廁所時(shí),很驚訝)
明星:You are too…enthusiastic [in,θju:zi'?stik]. (有點(diǎn)嫌棄)
A: Can you give me your signature?
(講到簽名,明星就興奮了)
明星:Ok ,of course!
A:(大聲喊)Oh ,I will have the Handsome______’s signature
(突然,兩個(gè)人跑過(guò)來(lái),B把A給推開(kāi)了然后兩人問(wèn)明星要簽名)
B:Please ,please give me signature!!!!!!!
C: No, give it to me, to me!!!
(兩人搶著,A一人孤零零的站在旁邊,)
A: Why the result is this ?(抱頭痛哭,邊走邊哭,然后走到睡覺(jué)的那個(gè)地方,恢復(fù)原來(lái)的樣子,還有點(diǎn)啜泣)
A: Er? Where is it? Oh,it’s just a dream , but ,it’s a bad dream.
It’s too early, I want sleep.(又趴下去)
旁白:In her second dream, the scene is at the crossroads.
A: Look at the tall buildings, they like the …like the …I don’t have any adjrectives to describe them.
(明星上場(chǎng),走在對(duì)面,也在欣賞某些東西)
A:Oh ,look at there, that man is like a star ! Oh ,Oh ,Oh ,(一次比一次激動(dòng))he is …..he is…..Handsome_______!I want his signature! But there is too much cars, What can I do? What can I do? I don’t care this any more, the signature is more important!
(正當(dāng)他準(zhǔn)備過(guò)馬路時(shí),車主做開(kāi)車動(dòng)作來(lái)了,將要撞A,A很害怕)
車主:Look out!
Aon’t come here, don’t come here!(閉著眼睛) (車主迅速下臺(tái))
。ˋ突然站起來(lái),睜開(kāi)眼睛)
A:A dream .too? Oh, my god, Why do I always can’t get the signature? No, I must get it, sleep again! Yes ,sleep! But ,why do I stand here? I should lie in the bed. Whether these, I must go to bed and get the signature!(趴著又睡)
旁白:In her third dream
(明星在簽名,A前面有B, C)
經(jīng)紀(jì)人:One by one,Don’t be wrought-up
A: Yeah,I can get it at last. Before me ,there are only two people.
。ǖ紹)
B:I love you very much. My dreamlover.
明星:Thank you
(B下,C上)
C: Oh,I meet you ,can I hug with you ?
明星:Sure.
(兩人抱了一下)
。ǖ紸)
A: I can get your signature in the end! I’m so excited
(明星面目有點(diǎn)難受的樣子,手捂著肚子)
明星:Sorry, can I go to the toilet for a moment? My stomach is hurt a lot.(難受)
A: Yes, make yourselfe at home.
(過(guò)來(lái)一會(huì)兒)
A: Handsome_______ has gone to toilet for such a long time. Is he ok?
經(jīng)紀(jì)人對(duì)A說(shuō):Sorry, the girl, Handsome_____ perhaps can’tcome here to give you signature, He is too hurt. He went home.
A: Ah? Why always me ? (傷心地離開(kāi),走到睡著的地方)
。ㄍ蝗黄鹕恚
A :Why always me ? I only want a signature~~ ai~~ What time is it now ? (看了一下鐘,表情驚訝) It’s near 8 o’clock .I can’t arrive at the school on time! Oh no ,hurry up hurry up!
英語(yǔ)搞笑話劇劇本 篇3
Justice Is The Winner(正義必勝)
by Cecilia Liu 劉怡芬
5人短劇。
人物
Bunny Cheng: Bunny Chen
Eliza Lin: Daughter
Celine Tu: Reporter et Aside
Sano Hsieh: Small gangster(小流氓)
Trent Cheng: Big gangster(大流氓)
SCENE I
A mother is doing exercise in the living room when the phone is ringing. And her daughter is in the school now.
Mom: Hello~
Caller: (A boy is crying.) Ha! Your kid is here. Do you hear his voice? If you want to save your kid, prepare the ransom.
Mom: Are you crazy? I don’t have a son!!! Don’t try to cheat me. Stupid guy!
The mother is very angry and hung up the phone. But later… the phone is ringing again…
Mom: Hello~
Caller: Hello~ Are you busy now?
Mom: (I recognize the voice.) You are a fraud, right? Do you want to trick me again? Is it fun? Don’t do such a boring thing, O.K.? I won’t believe you.
Caller: Really? Listen to this.(A girl is crying on the phone, ”mom, help me~ help me~)
Mom: Oh~ you are a good actor. This time is better but I still won’t fall into your trap to rob me of my money! If you call again, I will call the cop. Do you understand? (Hang up the phone more angrier.)
But the voice sounds like her daughter’s and the mom is not disturbed. She decides to go to the elementary school to see her daughter. The mom got there…
Mom: Eliza~
Eliza: Mom~ why you are here? Are you missing me? Do you come here to pick me up?
Mom: Ya~ are you happy in the school? Let’s go home. I want to tell you something on the way home.
Mom tells Eliza about the phone scam and wants her to be careful from now on.
SCENE II英語(yǔ)劇本大全ww.coffbar.com
Because the mother didn’t believe the two gangsters really kidnapped her kid, the gangsters were furious. So they decided to kidnap her daughter this time.
The gangsters have found the school her daughter studies in, and observed for many days. Today is the day they plan to kidnap the child.
The big gangster always focuses on what he’s doing but the small gangster is usually absent-minded.
Big gangster: Hey! Concentrate!! (The big gangster hit the small gangster’s head)
Small gangster: Ouch! O.K. O.K.
At this moment, the girl appears.
Small gangster: (Check the picture.) Hey!! Buddy!! Look! Is that her?
Big gangster: Ha! Ha! Ha! It’s hunting time.
Small gangster: I’m so excited!! Oh~ what a beautiful girl. Just like a fairy. My sweetheart… Buddy do you know? I feel that I get butterflies in my stomach!
Big gangster: (Hitting the small gangster’s head again.) Hey! Wake up!! Stop day-dreaming. Let’s make a move!
Small gangster: Oh~ my baby~ I’m coming!!
Big gangster: Hey!! Lady!! Can you do me a favor?
Eliza: Sure! What can I do for you?
Small gangster: (Murmuring) This beautiful lady has a beautiful heart.
Big gangster: Sorry. Ignore what he said.
Eliza: Never mind!
Big gangster: Thanks! I want to go to Tunghai University. Do you know how can I get there?
Eliza: Oh… you should go straight until the traffic light, then turn right until you see a convenience store at the corner and turn left. Keep going straight and you would see the university.
Big gangster: Go straight until the first traffic light, turn right and we will see a supermarket at the end of the street. And…
Eliza: No! No! No! Go straight until the traffic light, then turn right until you see a convenience store at the corner and turn left. Keep going straight and you would see the university.
Small gangster: Go straight until the first traffic light, then turn left and go straight to the end of the street, then we can see the university.
Eliza: Oh, my! No! Wrong again! You two are really a stupid guy.
Big gangster: It’s too complex. I can’t remember all the directions. I’m a foreigner. And I have an important presentation there. Could you go with us, guide us there? Please~
Eliza was confused. But she is a kind person and she likes to help people.
Eliza: Umm… let me think… okay!! Let’s go!
Small gangster: How kind of you!! My little girl.
Big gangster: Sorry. Just ignore him. Thank for your help.
Eliza goes with the gangsters.
In the gangsters’ car, the small gangster suddenly shows a sharp knife. And shouts, “Don’t move!” Eliza is shocked and starts screaming.
Eliza: What are you doing?
Small gangster: I’m kidnapping you!
Eliza: Oh~ I am so scared.
Small gangster: (Talk to the big gangster.) Did you hear that, she is scared?
Big gangster: Ya~ we are professional.
Eliza: Not funny! I’m hungry. I want to go home! I want to go home!
Small gangster: Shut up. Don’t be so noisy!
Eliza keeps crying.
Small gangster: You! Get out of the car!
Big gangster: (Hit the small gangster angrily!) Idiot! I have a stupid partner. (Disappointed)
Eliza: I agree! (Nod head.)
Big gangster: Don’t cry baby, I give you a lollipop.
Eliza: Thank you. How kind of you.
SCENE III
Mother is preparing dinner.
Mom: Eliza! Eliza! Time for dinner! I’m hungry! Hurry up!
No one answers her. And she realizes there is something wrong.
Mom: Eliza, where are you? Don’t play hide and seek with me! It’s not funny. I’m hungry.
As the mother is finding her daughter, the phone rings.
Mom: Hello~ this is Anderson. I’m busy finding my daughter. Don’t bother me!
Big gangster: Are you finding your daughter? Ha! Ha! Ha… she is right here.
Mom: Good job! Tell her it’s time for dinner. I’m hungry!
Big gangster: Hey! You are clueless. I have already kidnapped your daughter, Eliza Anderson!
Mom: Hey! Buddy! Don’t trick me!
Big gangster: Sure! Listen! (The gangster takes the phone to Eliza.)
Eliza: Hello! Mom! I’m here! They are so kind. They gave me a lollipop.
The gangster takes the phone away.
Big gangster: Do you believe me now? If you want your daughter to come back for dinner. You have to prepare the ransom of NT $ 20,000,000.
Mom: Too expensive! 20% off.
Big gangster: Are you buying clothes?
Mom: Bargain is my hobby.
Big gangster: No negotiation you should bring the ransom to Tunghai Lake at 8:00 pm. And remember don’t call the cop. Or you will find your daughter in the lake.
Mom: O.K. See you then!
At Tunghai Lake. The gangsters and Eliza are baking fish from the lake because they are hungry. At this time, the mother is coming.
Mom: Ha! (Mom shouts.)
The gangsters and Eliza are shocked. And the small gangster’s fish is falling down on the floor.
Small gangster: Oh,! My fish! Who’s there?
Mom: It’s me, Bunny Anderson, Eliza’s mother, Anderson’s wife. Where is my daughter? Release my daughter.
Eliza: Hi! Mom, I’m here. Do you want to come here to eat fish?
Big gangster: Where is the ransom?
Mom: Release my daughter first!
Big gangster: Give me the ransom first!
Mom: No way!
And the battle begins.
Mom: Justice is always the winner.
Eliza: Oh~ Yeah! Mom, you win!
Celine: Ha! I got it! I got it! A new…… headline.
Celine: I am at Tunghai Lake. Earlier, there was a violent fighting. A watermelon knife V.S. A B.B.Q. fork. According to the witnesses, a mother fought with the gangsters for her daughter. And the mother won. Now, let’s interview the persons involved.
Celine: Do you feel regretful? Do you feel sorry to this society?
Small gangster: I……
Celine: I…… I know. You are very sorry and regretful. How about you? (Turn to the big gangster.)
Big gangster: None of your business. (Run to the wall.) Leave me alone.
Eliza: Me! Me!
Celine: What do you want to say?
Eliza: Uh…My mom is so cool. She came to save me!
Mom: My turn. My turn.
Celine: O.K. O.K. What do you want to say after winning the fight?
Mom: Well……
Celine: Well, you are very happy and proud of yourself to be the winner in the battle.
Mom: Yes. And the gangsters…
Celine: Oh, the gangsters are very stupid and silly.
Mom: Right. And they…
Celine: They want to trick you, but…
Mom: But… enough. I’m hungry. I want to go home with my daughter.
Celine: Next time, if you receive a phone call from a scam artist, here are the things you can do to avoid being tricked. First, stay clam and be skeptical about it. The caller hopes to fool you with a moving story, causing you to forget your good judgment. A little doubt can protect you. Second, verify the story. Call the organization to make sure the story is true. Third, report it to the police. And don’t deal with the villains on your own. One phone call will often expose a trap quickly. However, to tell the truth, the mother is really very brave. She is my idol. I want to keep her sign. This is reporter Celine reporting from Tunghia Lake for TVAS.
英語(yǔ)搞笑話劇劇本 篇4
第一幕 開(kāi)場(chǎng)白
旁白:Long long ago there lived a beautiful princess, and there is a big family. But the hostess died. Her son is handsome and goodness. Her husband married another wife. The stepmother is very cruel to the son. One day their King will hold a ball and choose a prince for his daughter.
B: Girls in the other side look at me, look at me, look at me …I am David, handsome and cool. I try my best to loose my weight for this ball. This is my photo three days ago.
C: I am rich and humor. Look at my snow-white teeth, because I use the famous toothpaste---Peer.
A: Oh, Can I go to the ball?
B and C: No!
B: Look at yourself. The clothes are so bad and dirty.
C: Yes, yes.
B: Your hair …(用手撥幾下)
C: What a mass!
B: Your face
C: Black and dirty, you seemed like a frog.(B拿出青蛙的照片)
B: How can you go to meet the beautiful princess?
Stepmother: OK, children, let’s go!
C: Mum, what about him?
Stepmother: You, just stay at home to do some housework.
A: But, Mum, I want to go there.
Stepmother: Oh, OK.
B and C: Mum, why do you take him? Don’t you think he will loose our face?
Finally, they go without A.
第二幕 仙女下凡
A: Why Why Why I can’t go to join that ball.
旁白: At this time a beautiful fairy appear.
Fairy: Ahh, my poor child! What things make you so sad?
A: The beautiful princess will held a ball, but my stepmother and my brothers don’t let me go there.
Fairy: My good boy, let me help you. (拿出一套禮服)
A:(喜出望外,準(zhǔn)備去參加舞會(huì)。)
Fairy: Wait for a moment. Don’t forget your shoes.(拿出一雙耐克鞋)
A: Thank you, my respectful fairy.
第三幕 一見(jiàn)鐘情
旁白:A is wearing beautiful clothes going to the palace as quickly as possible, but his brother and stepmother have already arrived.
門衛(wèi):The next, the Trade’s first son.
B: Oh, beautiful princess. I have greatly admired you for a long time, and you are like a Pizza in my heart.
Princess: Please wait for a moment, what talent and skill you have?
B: I’ll sing a song for you. (Singing) Only you
Princess: Pass.
門衛(wèi):The next. The Trade’s second son.
C: La la I am a
Princess: Pass.
旁白:At that time A was appearing on the front door of the palace. All the people were shocked by his handsome and demeanor.
A: Beautiful princess. Can I sing a song for you?
Princess: Sure, please.
A: (扶著公主從寶座上走下,兩人目光對(duì)視,走成一個(gè)圈,開(kāi)始唱歌)。
旁白:All the people seem to disappear. Only A is left in the princess’s eyes. And so is the princess. Dang dang dang the clock strikes 12. A is waken from the happiness.
A: Princess, I must go now. I am very sorry.
Princess: Wait
旁白:In a hurry A dropped one of his shoes. But the princess was following him.
A: (A look at princess and that shoe he has to go into the forest.)
第四幕 丟失的鞋
旁白:The next morning, the guard brings the shoe to the princess.
侍衛(wèi):My princess, this is the shoe left by Yang Master yesterday.
Princess: That’s great! God save me! Go and declare: Whoever can wear this shoe will be my prince.
第五幕 結(jié)局
旁白:The guars declared this thing in the whole city and it caused a big sensation. The two prince of the Trade are more excited.
B: Oh, it’s so beautiful. I’m sure I can wear this shoe.
C: Do you think it is possible? Only I can wear that shoe.
Stepmother: Stop talking, my dear sons. Go to get ready for it quickly. The guards will come in no time.
旁白:A was sweeping floor more and more slowly. The guards came in.
侍衛(wèi):This is the shoe. Come and try it.
旁白:At this moment B caught it quickly, tried it and murmured.
B: why can’t I put it on?
Stepmother: My dear, let me help you.
旁白:The mother pulled B to the corner cutting his toe. Then B put the shoe very hardly.
B: My princess, let’s go.(一瘸一拐)
Princess: No, you are not my prince. Take off the shoe.
C: Let me try. Let me try. (murmuring)I cannot wear it either.
旁白:The mother pulled C to the corner again, and cut his heel.
C: My princess, let’s go.
Princess: No, you are not my prince, either. (一瘸一拐)
侍衛(wèi):Who else doesn’t try to put on the shoe here?
A: (In a low voice) Let me have a try.(A put the shoe without any difficulty. It just fit him. And A took off his dirty clothes again.)
Princess: Wow, you are my prince.
Princess and Prince got married. Then they live together and they are very happy.
英語(yǔ)搞笑話劇劇本 篇5
音樂(lè):apple(小熊表演)
Bears: Today is our birthday. We are so happy!
Rs: Knock, knock, knock. (敲門聲起)
Bears: Who’s that?
Rabbit1: I am **.
R2: I am **.
Rs: We are rabbits.
Bs: Come in ,please.(開(kāi)門,請(qǐng)進(jìn))
Rs: Happy birthday!(送花)
Bs: Thank you. Please take a seat.(做手勢(shì),請(qǐng)坐)
小熊把花插好
Ds: Knock, knock, knock. (敲門聲起)
Bs: who’s that?
D1: I am **.
D2: I am **.
D3: I am **.
Ds: We are dogs.
Bs: Come in ,please.
Ds: Happy birthday!
Bs: Thank you. Please take a seat.
小熊把花插好
Cs: Knock, knock, knock. (敲門聲起)
Bs: who’s that?
C1: I am **.
C2: I am **.
C3: I am **.
Cs: We are cats.
Bs: Come in ,please.
Cs: Happy birthday!
Bs: Thank you. Please take a seat.
小熊把花插好, 拿水果招待客人
Bs: Which friut do you like ?
Rs: It is red. It is raund.
Bs: Oh! It’s apple. Here you are.
Rs: Thank you.(做吃狀)
Ds: It’s yellow .It’s long.
Bs: Oh! It’s banana. Here you are.
Ds: Thank you.
Cats: It’s oraner .It’s raund.
Bs: Oh! It’s oranger. Here you are.
Cs: Thank you.
小熊面向觀眾道白
Bs: Today is our birthday. We are so happy.
轉(zhuǎn)身招呼小動(dòng)物們
Bs: Let’s singing , let’s dancing.
As: Ok!
歌曲:Hello!
<結(jié)束>
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